Five Life-Changing Lessons From Narcissistic Abuse in the Workplace.
First of all, what do we know about abusers? They manipulate through FOG (fear, obligation, and guilt).
- If you take anything away from this article, let it be:
The best response to someone that is emotionally abusing you: Do not show any emotion. Especially for women in male-dominated industries, gender-biased language is common, even when women are literally doing nothing different from men.
If you show emotion, they will quickly turn it around on you like you are the offender. They love to play the victim card, which brings us to number two.
2. Gaslighting: This is such a prominent tactic for abusers and narcissists. They delight in your confusion and making you question your reality. Remember this, trust yourself and your instincts.
3. Calmly state your response, and be prepared to repeat it.
They may not hear it the first time or choose to ignore you.
4. Set your boundaries and reinforce your boundaries.
Setting boundaries is not easy, especially if you are a people pleaser or grew up with a parent/guardian that showed you that their feelings were more important than yours because it conditions you to put others’ well-being before your own. Be prepared to call out their shitty behavior and let them know you will not tolerate it.
5. Be prepared to walk away from a phone call or a meeting.
Especially for narcissists, they want you in the room physically/virtually to use guilt, shame, and embarrassment tactics to bring you down and make themselves feel better due to their insecurities. If you have communicated your boundaries and nothing changes, they have no respect for you and complete disregard for your well-being.
It is vital to communicate your needs, what your boundaries are, and to call out abuse. Your mindset is essential when you’re dealing with emotional abuse.
Tips for your mindset in these situations:
- Someone you can confide in or a Facebook group or other virtual group.
- Practice some prepared responses until you feel confident saying them.
- Evaluate your boundaries if you need to add or reinforce them to protect yourself.
- Prepare an exit strategy and what that looks like for you.
It could be emergency savings, another job, a new business, or side hustle stacking. (If you are planning to start a new business, I got you!)
If you found this article helpful, please consider giving it a clap. I’d love to hear from you and your experiences or anything you would personally add.
I‘m here to support you, I want to see your business thrive and for you to never work for an abusive boss ever again!
